Morbid Thoughts

Things occasionally happen in a person’s life which lead to a reflection on one’s own mortality. Sometimes this means a religious experience. Sometimes it’s just lying in bed at night wondering if you’re going to wake up the next morning.

You might never consider it a possibility. You might think that’s only something that happens to old people. But really, you never know no matter what age.

I might not wake up tomorrow and nobody would notice. Not for a day at least. I’ve got roommates, but we work different schedules. They’re frequent gone before I get up and I often get home after they’re in bed. If I didn’t show up for work thanks to being dead, my boss would call an empty house and leave angry messages on my cell phone. Unless I specifically said that I’d drop by, none of my family would think anything odd if they didn’t hear from me in a week or two. My friend would eventually send me an email asking if I’d died as he usually does if I haven’t responded to anything in a while, but hopefully someone would have noticed and told him that I was dead because I would have turned to mush by then.

I don’t particularly like the thought of dying in my sleep. There’s always something to do tomorrow or that I couldn’t do today. No point in making plans if you’re going to pop off at night. But you can’t keep that worry up indefinitely. It’s exhausting and depressing. But at the same time it doesn’t just go away. You can get up every morning and thank God you made it but all days end and back to bed you go.

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